Perchance to Dream
by Dark Aegis
Summary: If the Doctor was a dream...she did not want to wake up.
1. Chapter One: Dreams

**Title:** Perchance to Dream  
**Author:** Gillian Taylor  
**Rating:** K+  
**Summary:** If the Doctor was a dream...she did not want to wake up.  
**Characters:** Doctor(9), Rose, Jack, Ace, Doctor(7)  
**Spoilers:** Up to the first Jack episode

**Disclaimer: ** The Doctors, Rose, Jack, and Ace are not mine. I just like playing with them sometimes.

**A/N:** Thanks to nnwest for the betaing.

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"Perchance to Dream"

by Gillian Taylor

_Dreams_

The dream began as it always had. As sleep began to take her mind, she would find herself within the familiar trans-dimensional walls of the TARDIS' control room. However, and this was the part she hated the most; she was a mere observer in her body. She could not force her dream-self to hug the Doctor, nor could she force herself to grab Jack's arm and ask them why they had not come for her.

"Oi! Would you stop conspiring with my TARDIS?" the Doctor complained loudly as he wiped away the splatter of oil from his cheek. "You," he glared at the console, "Are supposed to be on my side."

"She just knows who's right in this case, Doctor," Jack grinned, "That would be me." He patted one of the support columns fondly.

"Jack, stop flirting with the TARDIS," Rose laughed, "And you," she turned towards the Doctor, "Try fixing the TARDIS without hitting her with the mallet this time."

"I'll have you know that sometimes you have to use brute force," the Doctor replied, somewhat tersely, "I don't like doing it, but that's all she'll respond to."

The TARDIS' console emitted a sound that was similar to 'BLAT!' as if the ship itself were disagreeing with his words. Rose only laughed harder at the noise as the Doctor looked at her balefully.

The Doctor shook his head and muttered something about 'silly apes' under his breath as he climbed back under the console. However, before he fully disappeared under the machine, the Doctor looked directly at Rose. In direct odds to their previous teasing, his face was serious, "Rose Tyler, don't forget. I'm coming for you."

The Doctor's words reverberated through her sleep fogged mind and she vaguely wondered just why he had told her that so fervently. His expression had been fearful, as if there was something important that he could not tell her about because of some antiquated law of time.

"Doctor?" she whispered as she opened her eyes.

There had been far too many nights like this. Nights where she had sat huddled in a blanket, after the dream, curled against the wall of her tiny cell and listened to the rain pour in sheets outside. With each rumble of thunder, she could imagine that she heard the sound of the TARDIS materializing on yet another amazing world. If she closed her eyes, she could almost see the Doctor and Jack as they explored the universe together. She missed those days no matter what the so-called doctors told her.

By her calculations – and the scratches on the wall – she had been in the asylum for ten days. Ten long and arduous days wherein Doctor Jenkins had told her, in his too smooth voice, that there was no such thing as the Doctor, or Jack, or the TARDIS, or any one of the magnificent things that she had seen over the past two years. He had insisted that she had invented them as some sort of coping mechanism after she had been caught in the explosion at Henriks. Rose denied it, of course, but as each day passed with no rescue she had to wonder – what if Jenkins was right?

Was the Doctor nothing but a dream? She still denied it. How could she not? Deny that she had seen the end of the world? Met Charles Dickens? Met Jack after falling from a barrage balloon in WWII London? That she had walked on a planet called Woman Wept? How could she deny those adventures? It would be like denying a part of herself.

If the Doctor was a dream…she did not want to wake up.


	2. Chapter Two: Therapy

_Therapy_

The light filtered through the drawn blinds in long beams, etching patterns of shadows and light on the mahogany desk and the leather sofas scattered about the room. Doctor Samuel Jenkins' office and therapy room seemed to fulfill every clichéd characteristic of a psychologist's inner sanctum that had ever been conceived of by the human race. Rose Tyler hated every wooden sculpture, book, and plush cushion inside of it. To her, it represented everything that she had lost. It was an obvious reflection of what she feared most; that the Doctor was nothing but a dream.

"Rose, do you know where you are?" Doctor Jenkins asked in an almost hypnotic tone of voice.

She looked at the balding man with contempt in her eyes, "Of course I do. We're on Earth, London, 2005. I believe you said this place was called Belleview Asylum."

"Do you know why you're here?" Jenkins continued, repeating the same questions that he had asked for the past ten days.

"You think that I'm a nutter even though I'm not," Rose shrugged, determined that this time she would not listen to him. This time, she would not allow him to plant another seed of doubt within her mind. The Doctor was real. He had to be real.

"Rose, you're not a nutter..." he began.

"Oh, I'm not?" Rose smiled sweetly, "Can I go home then?"

"You're merely confused," Jenkins completed his thought as if she had never spoken, "Severe trauma, such as what you suffered in the Henriks explosion, can cause the human mind to try to cope in a variety of ways. You merely chose to represent your inner anguish by creating these labels of 'Doctor' and 'Jack.' Your adventures, if you will, are reflections of those things that you wish that could have in your real life."

"I have those things in real life. I have the Doctor, Jack, the TARDIS, and all of my travels. That is real life, Doctor Jenkins. You cannot convince me that they're not real. You remember the Autons. They're the reason the Doctor destroyed Henriks. He had to stop the transmitter!" Rose felt as if she was fighting to justify herself and she did not like that emotion at all.

Jenkins sighed as he pulled a folder from the top of his desk and slid its contents towards her, "Look at those, Rose. They're pictures of the locations you had described to me during our earlier conversations. As you can see, there is no entrance below the Eye to some sort of subterranean shelter for a plastic creature. There was no 'alien landing' here in London. Big Ben still stands as tall and proud as it always has. I'm sorry, Rose, but you have to recognize the truth. You have to accept reality."

"No," Rose whispered, tears forming in her eyes, "You're wrong. He's real. I know he's real."

"How do you know that for certain, Rose? If you can tell me that..."

She had no answer beyond, "Because I'd feel it in here, okay?" She tapped her chest just over her heart.

"You're in love with a fantasy, Rose. The sooner you accept that, the sooner you'll be able to go home."

"Home is a blue police box," she insisted, "Not my Mum's flat."

"I see that we still have quite a bit of work to do," Jenkins took off his glasses and rubbed them clean with a handkerchief to hide his sigh.


	3. Chapter Three: An Ace in the Hole

_An Ace in the Hole_

Her eyes felt grimy and swollen from the tears. She hated to admit it but despite the Doctor's words in her dream her doubts were starting to grow. It had been three weeks according to the scratches on the wall. Three weeks wherein three times a day she had to defend her beliefs against an ever more convincing Doctor Jenkins. "Oh, Doctor," she sighed, rubbing her eyes, "Where are you?"

She leaned against the wall of her cell and closed her eyes. If she concentrated, perhaps, she could be with him again. At least in her dreams, he was real. Vaguely she wondered if this was what going crazy felt like. It might have been a minute or hours later when she woke to the sound of a struggle outside her door. Much to her surprise, the door opened to reveal a rather disheveled woman wearing a black jacket emblazoned with several different colored patches struggling against two of the orderlies.

"Hey! Let me go you apes! I'm telling, you, the Professor will get me out of here. And when he does..."

Doctor Jenkins followed behind, smiling benevolently at both the struggling woman and at Rose, "You can protest all you want, Dorothy, but the fact remains that until you acknowledge your fantasies, you'll never get out of here. Good morning, Rose. You have a new roommate - this is Dorothy McShane."

"Don't call me that," the newly labeled Dorothy protested, glaring at Jenkins, "It's Ace, or nothing at all."

"Dorothy here," Jenkins continued as if Ace had not spoken at all, "Shares similar fantasies to you, Rose. I'm hoping that the two of you can help cure one another. Besides, I thought you could do with a friend since the only one you have at the moment is imaginary."

"Some doctor you are," Ace complained, "Since when do you tell someone that they've only got an imaginary friend?"

"Dorothy, you do not have room to talk. We'll leave you two alone to get acquainted. Gentlemen?" The two burly orderlies released Ace and stepped outside the door before she could punch one of them.

"So," Ace said conversationally as she plopped herself onto the other bed, "Who are you then?"

Rose blinked a little in shock. Her head felt a bit like it was spinning out of control – much like her life at the moment. Realizing that Ace was waiting for an answer, she replied, "Rose. Rose Tyler."

"Nice to meet you, Rose. Before I say anything more, are you here because you really are crazy? Wait, scratch that. Someone who was crazy would say that they weren't. Or something like that," the dark haired woman said almost as if she were talking to herself.

"The same could probably be said for you. So, if we agree to continue to think we're not crazy – I think we'll be alright."

"Right then," Ace nodded, "Makes sense. So...what are you in here for?"

"They," Rose gestured towards the door to indicate the doctors, specifically Jenkins, "Believe that I'm suffering from delusions. The Doctor and Jack are not delusions. They're not! Nor is the Jagrafess, or the barrage balloon in World War II..."

Ace blinked, "Wait a tic. You said 'the Doctor?' Short fellow, wears a hat, carries an umbrella and likes tea?"

"No...he's tall, wears a black leather jacket, carries a sonic screwdriver, and likes chips."

"Hmmm…earlier or later regeneration, then," Ace murmured, "Have you been in the TARDIS?"

"The TARDIS?" Rose's eyes widened in shocked recognition, "You do know the Doctor! Though that doesn't sound like him at all. He's never worn a hat for as long as I've known him."

"Sounds like the Professor's changed, then. But that happens with Gallifreyans, you know. But, you know what this means Rose?"

"What?"

"We're not crazy! It's those blokes out there that are nutters. We've got to get out of here!" Ace grinned and for a moment Rose was reminded of the manic grin her Doctor wears so well. Strangely, Rose found herself trusting Ace immediately – almost as if she reminded her of the Doctor.

Quietly, the two women began to plan for their escape.


	4. Chapter Four: Jack

_Jack_

The first thing Jack was painfully aware of as he woke was that he was chained to a wall. And that he was naked. Admittedly, in some cases he would not be objecting to the treatment but since he certainly wasn't feeling as if he had spent a pleasurable evening in someone's arms he definitely objected. The former Time Agent held himself still as his senses told him that someone else was in the room with him. Without knowing if they were friend or foe – and he was leaning towards foe on the whole scheme of things – he had no desire to let them know that he had regained consciousness. There were some things he needed to figure out first – like where he was and where the Doctor and Rose were. Once he knew that, he could go about getting himself free.

"No need to fake it, Captain," a taunting voice spoke from somewhere to the left of where he was chained. "So you might as well open your eyes and take a look around."

With a barely repressed sigh, Jack did so. However, instead of facing some strange megalomaniac bent upon world domination he faced an English teenager. He also couldn't help but notice that he was rather pretty. "Hello," Jack said with one of his patented mega-watt smiles, "Jack Harkness. And, just to let you know, I normally don't give just anyone permission to defrock me. But for you, I think I'll make an exception."

"I didn't need your permission to do anything, Captain. Besides, you're just here because I haven't decided what to do with you yet."

"If I might make a few suggestions?"

"Shut it," he snapped, "I can't quite see what they saw in you that they didn't see in me. He called me 'pretty' and treated me as if I were Rose's pet. And then he dumped me back at my home without as much as a goodbye. And yet, from what I've seen, you've lasted for much longer. Are you their pet, Jack? Are you their little love slave? Oh, I can see that you are. It's obvious to me. After all, why would they pick you when they could have had me?"

"Who are you?" Jack asked, dropping all pretenses of flirtation. At the moment, he was deadly serious. "And where are Rose and the Doctor?"

"Oh, wouldn't you like to know?" he laughed, "But it wouldn't hurt to tell you my name at least. I'm Adam Mitchell."

"You're the one with the..." Jack snapped his fingers and obediently the compartment on Adam's forehead opened, "Ah-ha, I see that you are. No wonder they dumped you."

"Stop that!" Adam snapped his fingers again to close the port, "No wonder they...I can easily gag you, Captain. Don't think that I won't."

"Oh, I have no doubts of that. Where are the Doctor and Rose?"

Adam grinned and Jack could easily see the insanity that lurked behind the boy's eyes. Sadly, he decided to notch the teenager up to an annoyance. "Worried about your friends? Sorry, I can't allow you to see them. Might ruin my plans, you know."

"And those are?" If there was one constant about megalomaniacs it was their need to monologue. Vaguely he wondered if they really did get their jollies by telling their arch nemesis (read good guy) about how clever, wonderful, and awe inspiring they were.

"Simple. I plan to erase the Doctor from time itself."

'Cue insane laughter,' Jack thought as Adam proceeded to do just that.


	5. Chapter Five: Adam vrs Jack

_Adam vrs. Jack_

Adam Mitchell ran his fingers across Rose's sleep slackened face and smiled. Once he had told her that it would take a better man than he to stand between her and the Doctor. Soon, provided the device worked as advertised, there would no longer be a 'better man'. Rose would be his and he could show her that he was everything that she needed. "Soon, my love, soon," he told the silent figure on the bed. Rubbing his hands together slightly for warmth, he circled the bed to reach the other unconscious body.

"Ah, Doctor, it's too bad that you're not awake to enjoy this," Adam said, checking the consoles that monitored the two people on the beds. Several silver-clad tubes connected the Doctor's head to Rose's. Tiny filaments stretched into each mind feeding thoughts and projections into each. "You see," he said as he walked around the bed, eying his nemesis, "The interesting thing that I learned about Time Lords – and it was rather hard to come across anything of use, I'll have you know – is that each one carries a bit of the temporal vortex inside their minds. That's how you manage to know about the ebb and flow of time and all that. Interesting, no?" He paused as if he would get a response from either one of his captive audience, "Well, I thought so. You see, I found out that if I could just convince a Time Lord of his non-existence that he could essentially wipe himself from the timeline. Oh, it has been tried before or so I discovered, but no one ever thought to use someone that the said Time Lord cared for as the means of that erasure. That, of course, took my genius to figure out.

"So, Doctor, your precious Rose is going to be the reason why you get wiped from the timeline. Fantastic, isn't it?" Adam grinned. Satisfied that everything was proceeding according to plan, he returned to his other captive. Sadly, Jack Harkness was a bit of a problem. While Adam could cause the indirect death of someone like the Doctor, he could not kill directly. That was far too messy in his eyes; he had seen enough direct death during that episode with the Dalek. He stood in front of the shackled Time Agent and considered him with a thoughtful gaze.

"Come to gloat?" Jack asked, feigning a yawn, "You're an idiot, you know. And to think the Doctor only called Mickey an idiot. Then again, the Doctor never really mentioned you beyond the whole snap on, snap off feature."

"Oh please," Adam said, rolling his eyes, "You think that you're so much better than me."

"That's because I am."

"You're not," Adam insisted, "I captured you, the Doctor, and Rose. Me. All by myself. And now, you're going to get to watch the Doctor join the rest of his species in timelessness."

"Me, me, me. I, I, I. That's all that matters to you, isn't it? And here I thought we were getting somewhere. I felt a connection for a moment - something that hit me right in the gut. Oh, wait, that was indigestion."

Adam actually growled. "I'll have you know..." he began angrily, before stopping, "Clever. Trying to get me mad so I'll make a mistake? Too bad, I'm smarter than that."

"Oh, no. You figured out my clever plan. Damn," Jack said dryly, "I wonder. Have you really thought through these plans of yours? What happens when you get rid of the Doctor?"

"I get Rose," Adam said with a shrug.

"No," he corrected, meeting Adam's eyes, "You die."

"I hardly think you're in a position to threaten me, Jack."

"I'm not threatening you. I'm telling you the truth. You remove the Doctor from the timeline and everyone dies. The Daleks, the Cybermen, the Sonatrans, any one of the species that you haven't even dreamt of in your most horrendous of nightmares will take over the universe. All because of you and your childish wish to get even. The Doctor left you behind because he only takes the best. And you know what? I can't say I blame him if this is what you come up with for revenge. Because, Adam, in the end you don't win. No one does. Instead, the universe loses."

"He's just one man," Adam protested, "He can't have that much impact on history."

"Oh yes he can," Jack said, willing Adam to believe him, "He's the Doctor."


	6. Chapter Six: Jailbreak

_Jailbreak_

"If I still had my rucksack, we would be out of here in no time flat," Ace sighed as she leaned against the wall, "You wouldn't happen to have any Nitro Nine on you? No, wait, the apes outside would have taken all of that away. Bloody efficient buggers, damn them. Do you have any hair pins? Maybe I can just pick the lock...no, that won't work. There's a metal bar on the outside of the door. I couldn't pick that even if I had the Professor's sonic screwdriver."

Rose wasn't quite sure what to make of Ace, nor her continuous references to something called Nitro Nine. "Can't we just, I don't know. Pretend to be sick and when they come in hit them over the head with a chair?"

After a moment's silence, Ace shook her head, "You have no imagination. You know that?"

"Hey, I don't see you coming up with anything brilliant."

"I'm thinking..."

"Think faster."

In the end, they decided to go with Rose's plan. Doubling over as if her gut felt like it was about to explode, Rose moaned loudly while she silently gave thanks to Mrs. Eastman's drama lessons. "I don't feel so good..." she moaned, trying to add a bit more drama to her performance.

"Oi! Nurse! Orderly! Whatever! My roommate's sick!" Ace called out, standing by one of the chairs in the room.

"What is it?" a gruff voice called through the door, "Can't you take care of it yourself?"

Rose greeted that comment with an even louder groan.

"I think she's dying or something! Come on, have a heart would you?" Ace cajoled.

Grumbling could be heard through the door, but the two women could hear the clicks as the lock was disengaged. The orderly, sadly one of the burly ones who had manhandled Ace earlier, stepped into the room. "What's wrong with you, then?" he asked, his eyes on Rose rather than on the other occupant.

That was his biggest mistake since the next thing he knew a chair broke over his head and he was unconscious on the floor. "Baseball bats are usually more my thing, but that'll do," Ace grinned at Rose who immediately stood – miraculously well.

"Let's get out of here," Rose said and the two women stepped outside of their room to find themselves in a seemingly endless hallway with doors on either side. Ace quietly closed the door behind them and locked it. "Which way?"

Ace glanced up and down the hall before deciding on a direction, "That way."

While they walked, Rose couldn't help but feel that this was unlike any hospital – mental or otherwise – that she had ever been in before. For one, the halls were strangely silent and no nurses, doctors, or orderlies bustled about on their business. In fact, she'd almost think that it was nothing more than a reconstruction – a doll house made especially for her and Ace to roam through. As if that thought were a signal, a loud klaxon sounded through the hallway which was now bathed in a deep mauve color.

Turning towards each other, the two women grinned, "RUN!" they said in unison as orderlies piled out of the rooms like a swarm of angry bees. Unthinking, Rose grabbed Ace's hand and together they charged down the hallway.

One of the doors ahead of them opened and a strange little man wearing a funny hat and carrying a question mark handled umbrella popped his head out into the hall, "Quick, Ace! This way!"

"Professor!" Ace shouted gleefully and she dragged Rose behind her through the door.

The next thing Rose knew, she was surrounded by darkness.


	7. Chapter Seven: Explanations are in order

_Explanations are in order_

The inky blackness surrounded her and the only thing of substance that Rose knew was real was the feeling of Ace's warm hand grasped in her own. "What's going on here?" she asked, noticing for the first time that the sirens – which had been deafening only moments before – were silent.

"I thought you might ask that," a new voice commented, "Ah, yes, light. Just a moment." Rose could hear someone fumbling in the dark, bumping things, and a few muttered curse words that she could not quite understand. "There we are. Shield your eyes," the voice recommended just as light flooded the room.

Rose found herself in a room that rather reminded her of the library on the TARDIS. Bookshelves lined three of the walls while a massive stone fireplace dominated the other. Three chairs were set in front of the fireplace with a table between them. To her surprise, the table contained a tea set (with the fresh tea inside the teapot if the steam were anything to go by) and scones.

"Fancy a cuppa?" the Seventh Doctor asked with a warm smile, "I'm the Doctor, by the way. Rose, right?"

"Um, yes," Rose looked rather flabbergasted by the entire situation. "Doctor?" For some reason, she wasn't quite capable of intelligent speech.

"Yes, this is my Professor," Ace announced, "I don't know about you, Rose, but I'm dying for a cuppa. Professor? Want me to pour?"

"Please do, Ace," he nodded, "You look rather confused, Rose."

"Yes, I mean, of course I am. One minute we were in an asylum with dozens of orderlies after us and the next thing I know we're in a library and you're offering me a cup of tea like there's nothing wrong at all. What's going on here?" If she thought she was going crazy before; now she was certain of it.

"Well, I tend to find that tea helps immensely in cases like this. You've had a bit of a shock, Rose, and that's understandable. However, we can't enjoy this tea forever. Time waits for no man, or Time Lord you know. Sit down, Rose."

Obediently, she sat down in one of the high backed chairs and accepted a steaming mug from Ace. Sipping carefully, she eyed the two of them suspiciously. She honestly had no idea what to make of this turn of events. She could almost hear her Doctor saying something about the limited capacity of her human ape mind to comprehend things.

"I believe explanations are in order," the Seventh Doctor said, looking at Ace expectantly.

"Explanations. Right. Well, we're in the Professor's head, Rose. That's all that this is. And he," she pointed at the Seventh Doctor, "and I are just aspects of his mind. Well, I suppose you'd call us highly interactive memories. Anyway, we're trying to prevent your Doctor from willing himself into non-existence. It's a bad way to go. Not to mention the fact that if the Professor isn't around anymore, the Earth and the rest of the universe might as well just kiss their collective bums goodbye. It'd be like all the laws governing the universe just shut down. Death, destruction, evil races conquering the cosmos..."

"No more tea..." the Seventh Doctor sighed.

"The Doctor has an asylum in his brain?" Rose could feel a headache coming on.

"And he accused me of having issues with blowing things up, I know. Kinda puts things in perspective doesn't it?" Ace, or rather the projection of Ace, laughed. "Anyway, you mean you haven't been in the Doctor's mind before?"

"Well, no," Rose said, looking between the two figures with a questioning look in her eyes.

"Oh my, just what am I, or rather the future I, teaching my Companions these days?" the Seventh Doctor asked in shock.

"Oh, leave her alone Professor. It's not her fault that you, or rather the other you, hasn't told her about the twisted mess that is your brain," Ace replied with a grin.

"I'm sure that I have no idea what you're talking about Ace," he said rather primly.

"Just keep telling yourself that," Ace laughed. "So, anyway. We need to find your Doctor and stop him from deciding that he doesn't exist. However, since we're in the Professor's mind, finding him might take a while."

"Ace, what I don't understand is...why the asylum? Why, if this is just in the Doctor's mind, did I end up spending three weeks being told that the Doctor, Jack, and the TARDIS are nothing more than figments of my imagination? And why did you, if you're just an 'aspect of the Doctor's mind,' get thrown in there with me?"

"I suppose you'd call me a bit of a defensive measure. Once I figured out what was going on, I had myself put into the asylum to help convince you of the truth. The Professor is real. The TARDIS and Jack are both real. But, it took us a while to figure out what was going on. You see, Rose - you, the Doctor, and Jack have been captured. Someone's figured out how to convince a Time Lord to wipe himself from existence and you're their ticket for doing it."

"Me? Why me?"

"Because," the Seventh Doctor took up the tale, "You're one of my companions. As such, you're a chink in my armor. That's especially true since the end of the War. Rose, you're the only family I've got. You and Jack, that is, but I'm afraid Jack would not have been as effective as you."

"Why not?"

Suddenly, the Seventh Doctor looked rather uncomfortable, "I'd rather not say, Rose. It's not my place to tell you."

"ANYWAY," Ace said loudly, causing both the Doctor and Rose to jump, "We need to get moving. Find Rose's Doctor, save the universe, the usual."

"All in a day's work," the Professor declared, adjusting the fit of his hat and standing, "This way!" Pointing his umbrella towards a door on the opposite side of the room, the Seventh Doctor led the two women deeper into 'his' mind.


	8. Chapter Eight: Doctor

_Doctor_

'Why do we survive?'

The Doctor sat on the floor, his leather clad arms encircling his knees as he stared into the distance. He did not seem to notice the cuffs that tied him to the wall, nor did he seem to notice the strange emptiness of the room in which he had found himself. Instead, his thoughts were focused inwards upon the question posed to him by the Dalek.

'Why do we survive?'

He wasn't sure that he knew anymore. A day before, even an hour before, he would have said that he survived because he had to. There was too much to see, too much to do, too much to show Rose before he died. A day before he knew his place in the universe. A day before he had Rose. He wasn't sure if he had that anymore.

'Why do we survive?'

There was no answer to that question. Perhaps there never was. Could he, the Doctor, be nothing more than a dream? How did that quote go..."Am I a man dreaming that I am a butterfly? Or am I a butterfly dreaming that I am a man?" Something of that sort. He normally would never consider that he was nothing but a figment of someone's imagination, but he had a feeling that someone else was starting to believe that to be true.

"Rose," her name echoed strangely in the all too bare room, but even still he did not struggle against his bonds. Her name was a benediction, a prayer. He was suffering from a crisis of faith and he knew – as all Time Lords knew – that if he did not begin to believe again he would be gone.

No more Doctor. No more TARDIS. No more saying 'Fantastic!' with a manic grin and grabbing Rose by the hand as they ran for their lives. No more Rose.

Of all of those choices, it was the last that hurt the most. "Rose," he said again. The Doctor bowed his head and let the tears fall freely.

'Why do we survive?'

He did not know anymore.


	9. Chapter Nine: The Needle and the Haystac

_The Needle and the Haystack_

"I think you need to do a little spring cleaning, Professor," Ace commented dryly as they trudged up a staircase. The trio had been through dozens of rooms, each more bizarrely decorated than the last. However, no matter how hard they looked or what pile of clothes they looked under there was no sign of Rose's Doctor.

"I'll be sure to mention that to me," the Seventh Doctor said as he eyed the landing, "I'm sure I'm somewhere around here. It's not like me to misplace myself."

Rose looked a little confused and Ace took pity on her, "Don't mind him. He's a little, you know, eccentric."

"I'll have you know that I am not eccentric," he protested.

"No? What are you then?"

"Unique."

"Like there's a difference," Ace rolled her eyes.

"If you and the Professor, there, are aspects of the Doctor's mind does that mean you're talking to yourself?" Rose asked, finally voicing the question that had been plaguing her since they had entered the room dominated by an impossibly multi-colored jacket.

Ace stopped walking and turned towards Rose, her eyes dancing with mirth, "I believe the Professor once said 'I've always believed that talking to oneself is the first sign of sanity.'"

"Enough chitchat," the Doctor chided them both as he stepped onto the landing and looked up and down the hallway, "Ah, yes, I remember this place."

"Know exactly where we are, do you?" Ace asked.

"Yes."

"And where are we?"

"In my mind."

Ace sighed, "I was asking for that, wasn't I?"

The Doctor grinned at her. Rose fought back the urge to groan.

"Ah, yes, this way," the Seventh Doctor turned right and walked past the hat stand that held a hat identical to the one he was wearing and a long multi-colored scarf. As they walked, Rose could not help but notice that the hallway seemed to be getting less crowded as they went on. While the previous floors and rooms had been cluttered with dozens of objects ('I have a rather cluttered mind,' Ace's Professor had explained), this one seemed to be more of a work in progress if that was the phrase for it.

"Um...Doctor," Rose said, feeling rather strange about addressing the man in front of her by the Doctor's name, "Where's all the stuff?"

"The stuff?" he asked.

"You know - the clutter. Everywhere else we've been there's been something underfoot or overhead or on the walls. This place seems a little...unfinished," Rose finished lamely.

"Ah, that's a good sign then. Or a bad one, if you think about it," he replied.

"Why do you say that, Professor?" Ace asked as she stepped around a dog-like robot.

"It's good because it means we're getting close. It's bad because it means that I, or rather the other me, is starting to give up," the Seventh Doctor replied, "Pick up the pace, Ace, Rose! I'm around here somewhere."

Rose was definitely getting a headache but she obediently picked up the pace. She had to find the Doctor, and quickly, before Ace and her Professor drove her mad or the Doctor willed himself out of existence.


	10. Chapter Ten: Time

_Time_

Time flickered.

On a world that had never known invasion by an alien force and had been content in its misguided belief that they were alone in the universe was violently proven wrong. On another planet, a massive explosion rippled across its surface wiping out all life – including a young girl who might have become something more. In another time, a fissure opened in space unnoticed and unchecked for not only were the Time Lords gone – so was their only legacy.

Time sighed.

On the third planet of the Sol System, changes in history rippled across its surface as the planet itself began to flicker. A moment, and it was a burnt husk of a world supporting no life beyond that of single celled organisms. Another, the cities that covered its surface were burning from the onslaught of merciless alien weapons. Another, the world seemed calm and serene – but for the fact that no intelligent life walked upon its surface. A second passed, and it returned to the way it had always been – a blue, green orb supporting its varied life forms as it spun through space.

Time flickered.

In a closed room in London, Adam Mitchell watched the Doctor's body slowly grow transparent and grinned.

Time rippled.

Jack broke free.


	11. Chapter Eleven: Meeting of the Minds

_Meeting of the Minds_

Rose shivered as she followed Ace and her Professor down the ever emptying hallway. There was a disturbing quality about the place – as if its occupant had suddenly decided to stop. No life was evident in the hall, no spark of color, no knickknacks or curiosities from other worlds, nothing but bare white walls and plain wooden floors. She had had a dream once of a haunted house. Instead of cobwebs and darkness, there had been light and cleanliness. Instead of life, there was only life put on hold. She was strongly reminded of that dream now and that frightened her.

If the Doctor could give up; what did that mean for her?

As if her thoughts had summoned some sort of retribution, the floor rippled suddenly as if it could no longer determine if it were solid, liquid, or gas.

"Watch out!" Ace shouted as she gripped the back of the Doctor's jacket just before the floor in front of him dropped away.

"Oh dear," the Seventh Doctor said as he looked around the hallway. A door off to the side seemed to be their only means of escape and he pointed his umbrella in that direction, "Through there! Quickly!"

The trio tumbled into the room – no less bare than the outside – and slammed the door behind them. Rose suspected that if they were to attempt to open it again, nothing would be outside. The Doctor's mind was unraveling and she did not know if she could put it together again. A tear escaped her eye and she wiped it away angrily. She would save the Doctor. It was what she did. It was what she always did.

"Rose, you okay?" Ace asked, sympathy etched across her face.

"I'm fine," Rose managed a smile, "But what was that?"

"That," the Doctor replied with a hint of unaccustomed distress in his voice, "Was me starting to give up. I'm wiping away whole sections of my mind as I will myself out of existence. We must hurry! Where am I? Where am I?" he muttered, glancing about the room.

The only thing to occupy the white walled room was a single painting. Curious despite herself, Rose stepped forward to give the painting a once over while Ace and her Professor conferred. Done in the oils and paints of years gone by, Rose almost didn't recognize that it was her own face staring back at her from the frame. It was a painting of herself in the dress that she had worn when they had first met Charles Dickens. What was a painting of her doing in the Doctor's mind? Before she could ask her companions, Ace pointed towards a metal door on the opposite side of the room.

"Let's try that one, Professor. I don't fancy going back the way we came."

"Neither do I," the Seventh Doctor agreed, adjusting the fit of his hat as he led the way once more to the door. Twisting the knob firmly, he pushed it inwards.

"Oh, it's you. I should have known," the Doctor said in a strangely hollow voice.

"Of course it's me, you idiot," the Seventh Doctor said, glaring at his successor, "Just what do you think you're doing?"

From his position on the floor, the dark leather clad Time Lord looked somewhat surprised by the tone of voice his other self used.

"Doctor!" Rose cried, pushing past Ace and her Professor to scramble across the room to kneel beside her friend. The Doctor's appearance was rather shocking – his hair was greasy, his cheeks hollowed, and to her horror his eyes looked dead. "Let me get this off you," she said gently, pulling a bobby pin from her hair and trying to pick the lock on his handcuffs.

"Didn't you know, Rose?" he asked, seemingly unaffected by her appearance besides a slight increase in his breathing, "I'm only a figment of your imagination."

"Piffle!" the Seventh Doctor exclaimed, slamming the end of his umbrella on the floor with a loud 'THUMP,' "You're no one's figment. You're the Doctor! And if you don't come out of this funk of yours the entire universe is going to end!"

"Why should I care? Why should I survive when no one else does?"

Even Rose stopped what she was doing to stare at him in shock.


	12. Chapter Twelve: Confrontation

_Confrontation_

Jack had found his blaster lying next to a broken Dareen harp and an alien hairdryer. Strangely, he had yet to find his clothes but that minor detail did not deter the former Time Agent. With a cocky grin, he slipped through the doorway and into the hall. If he were a vengeance-obsessed teenager, where would he hide the Doctor and Rose? The answer was obvious, at least to him.

'In the bedroom,' he thought as he opened the door, his weapon automatically tracking towards the only standing occupant of the room. "Didn't want to wait for me to join in the fun?" Jack asked, glancing suggestively between Adam and the prone forms of his friends on the bed. "I'm hurt."

"How did you get free?" Adam asked in shock.

"What can I say? I'm very flexible," Jack's grin turned wolfish, "What have you..." he finally got a good look at the almost transparent Doctor and gasped, "What have you done?"

"It's working," Adam grinned, unrepentant, "The Doctor's almost gone and there's nothing you can do to save them."

"You idiot. You stupid, misguided idiot. Do you have any idea of what you've done? Any!"

"I've won," he said simply.

With a low growl, Jack advanced across the room with his gun ever pointed at Adam's heart. Despite himself, Adam felt fear. Even though being naked should have made Captain Jack Harkness more vulnerable, Adam had the disturbing feeling that if anything it made him more powerful. He took an automatic step backwards.

Jack reached out and grabbed Adam's shoulder, shoving him against wall. With his gun hand, he used it to push back the curtains on the window. "Look at your victory, Adam. See what kind of kingdom you've built for yourself." With those words, he forced Adam's face into the window.

A choked "No" was the only intelligible word to emerge from Adam's mouth as he looked upon the horror that he had brought upon himself.

In the streets outside – the streets of London itself – wave after wave of Daleks moved in unison on their way to battle. If Adam listened carefully he could hear that dreaded word once again – the same word that had haunted his own sleep before the Doctor's betrayal had taken over that particular nightmare.

The word was, of course, spoken in a thousand Dalek voices.

The word was "EXTERMINATE!"


	13. Chapter Thirteen: Survival

_Survival_

"Hey, don't talk like that, mate. You've done worlds of good. Just think about what you're condemning both yourself and the rest of us to if you end up willing yourself out of existence. You survived because you had to," Ace said, stepping from behind her Doctor to look down at him.

A tiny smile appeared on his face, "Ever my conscience, Ace? Too bad. You're not here. Neither of you are. If I am but a figment, what does that make you?"

"NO!" the Seventh Doctor exclaimed, "Fight it, Doctor. Don't let it win!"

"Yes. You are a figment of a figment, both of you. And you know what? I deny you."

"Professor?" Ace asked staring in shock at her transparent hand, "What's going on?"

"I," the Seventh Doctor said sadly as he faded away, "Am doing a very stupid and foolish thing."

"Rose! Don't let him go, you hear me? Don't..." Ace's voice came from a distance even after her body disappeared, "Let him go."

"Doctor! What have you done?" Rose's voice reflected her shock as she watched her friends fade from view, "They were my friends."

The Doctor's voice changed, taking upon the honeyed tones of Doctor Jenkins, "Quite a coping mechanism you have, there, Rose. Inventing a Dorothy McShane to keep you company. Inventing the Doctor. When will you accept the truth? When will you accept reality?"

The hard crack of a hand meeting a cheek echoed through the room. Rose had not even realized that she had moved. "Don't you ever talk like that. Never! You're real, Doctor. You know you are! So, stop it!" Despite herself, she felt tears well up in her eyes.

"Am I real, Rose? Really?" The Doctor's voice was normal as he turned to look at her, "Then why can I feel what you're feeling? Why can I feel your desperation? How can I feel that, Rose, if I am not just some figment of your imagination?"

"I don't know, okay? Maybe the TARDIS did something, or whoever took us. I don't know, but you're real, Doctor. You have to believe me."

"Why?" he asked, his blue eyes fathomless in their despair.

"Because if you're nothing but a figment, Doctor. If you're nothing but a dream..." Rose's voice broke as she suddenly leaned forward to press her lips against his. When she broke away, she continued in a small voice, "I don't want to wake up again."

The Doctor's eyes closed and through his dark lashes she could see tears.

"Do you see, Doctor? You matter. You matter to me, you matter to Jack, you matter to this entire universe. Without you, what's the point?"

"Oh, Rose," the Doctor's voice broke much as hers had and she wrapped her arms around him, "Why do we survive?"

"Because we can," she whispered into his neck, "Because we have to. Because without us, who is there to remember?"

With a pang the Doctor came to a realization of what he had almost done. He had almost condemned the Time Lords, Gallifrey, his entire planet's history to nothingness. Without him, there would be no last Time Lord. There would be no Time Lords at all.

There would only be Rose, and even then she did not know the half of it.

He suddenly knew the answer to the Dalek's question.

'Why do we survive?'

"To remember."


	14. Chapter Fourteen: Aftermath

_Aftermath_

Jack felt as if his cheeks would split from the size of his grin as he watched the Doctor solidify before his eyes. "Ha...look at that!" He exclaimed, distracting Adam from his consideration of the Dalek invasion.

The English teenager turned and watched in horror as the Doctor lost his transparency. "NO!" he shouted, trying to wrench free of Jack's grip.

Jack's eyes hardened and without a second's span of regret, he hit Adam over the head with the butt of his weapon. He, and the Doctor, would deal with him later. Leaving the crumpled teenager behind, he headed to the bed and looked at the cables that connected his two friends together. "Hmmm...looks like Firian technology. Where the hell did you get this, Adam?" he asked as he carefully moved one of the tubes to see what lay beneath. Adam, of course, did not answer.

"Doctor? Rose? Come on, guys, time to wake up," he encouraged as he tried to make heads or tails of the device that they were wired into. He could make an educated guess on how to disconnect them, but he would much rather see if they would wake up naturally before he started cutting wires. Besides, he had no idea of what Adam had actually planned other than it involved Rose and having the Doctor get wiped from time. Not much to go by, admittedly, but he had been through worse.

Really.

"Well," he announced to the room, "Looks like I've got a long night ahead of me."

There were some days where he had it in him to be patient. He could stalk a possible target for a con for days with little more than a few cups of coffee, a hyper vodka, and a few stolen moments of shut-eye to live by. Today was not one of them. Jack stalked between the bed and Adam's prone form, alternating between glaring at the source of his current tension and glancing worriedly at the Doctor and Rose. It was strange to see the two of them so still – like him, they were too full of life to simply stop without gesturing excitedly about some fantastic discovery. "Great," Jack said with a sigh, "You've got me saying it too, Doctor. Or, rather, thinking it."

After another ten minutes of pacing, Jack stopped in front of Adam's unconscious form and considered it, "You know, Adam. A nice man wouldn't hit you while you're down. A nice man wouldn't want to kick you several times until you bleed because of what you had done to his friends. Sadly for you, I'm not a nice man." A solid kick in the stomach was Adam's first reward for almost destroying time itself. Another was Jack's revenge for Rose. A harder one was for the Doctor.

He released a whistling breath through his teeth as he stepped away. To be truthful, it wasn't much fun to kick someone while they were unconscious. There was no satisfaction – and Jack definitely liked satisfaction. Leaving Adam behind again, he considered the device that connected his two friends together. If he could find the Doctor's sonic screwdriver, maybe he could figure out some means of disconnecting them. Maybe.

"If I were the Doctor," Jack said, looking at the subject of his wonderings, "Where would I hide my sonic screwdriver?" Both the Doctor and Rose were fully clothed, the only evidence of their trauma was the device and yellowing bruises on the side of their skulls. "Ah, if only you were awake to enjoy this, Doctor," Jack commented as he fished through the Doctor's leather jacket. He found the screwdriver inside one of the interior pockets and he set it aside before pulling the Doctor's jacket more firmly around his friend's shoulders. He justified the gesture by assuming that it might get cold later – which reminded him of his own current state of undress.

To Jack, it truly did not matter if he walked around naked. However, there were some advantages to clothing – such as pockets. However, he had no intention of leaving the room with Adam-the-idiot still alive. Shrugging slightly, he decided to forego the clothing and turned on the sonic screwdriver. He needed to do some tinkering.

It took him ten hours, hitting Adam over the head twice, and fifteen cups of coffee but he finally managed to disconnect the Doctor and Rose from the Firian machine. However, neither one of them seemed to be in any hurry to wake up. To be truthful, he was rather worried.

"Time to come back to the real world, guys. Please?" Jack said as he brushed his hand against Rose's cheek before repeating the gesture with the Doctor.

Jack sank down onto the bed and sighed. What would he do if they never woke up? He sincerely hoped he would not have to find out.


	15. Chapter Fifteen: Home

_Home_

Rose slowly became aware of the ache in her muscles as she knelt next to the Doctor, enfolding him within her arms. With a tiny regretful sigh she let him go so she could shift and let out a gasp of astonishment as she took in the room. No longer bare, its blue-tinged walls were covered with eight by ten photographs – or what looked like photographs – of people and scenery. She could identify some of them from what she had seen both in the Doctor's mind and during their adventures. There were several of herself, a few of Jack, a few of Ace's Professor standing next to Ace with a proud grin on his face, and dozens upon dozens more. Everywhere she turned was another memory. There, a picture of the London Eye. There, a castle of some kind. There, a massive city on a plain. Rose stood and walked closer to the images on the walls, her eyes wide in astonishment.

"Gallifrey," the Doctor said as he moved to stand behind her.

"What?"

"That's a picture of Gallifrey. The Citadel, to be precise," he hesitated for a moment before placing his hand upon her shoulder, "My home."

"It's beautiful," she breathed, taking in the various images as he pointed them out to her.

"Each image is a memory – a place that I've visited, a person that I knew, something that I never want to forget. Thank you, Rose, for reminding me of this."

Rose smiled as she turned towards him and hugged him again. She felt his arms go around her in a gentle squeeze – she felt as if she could stay like that forever. The sound of his hearts beating was comforting, and she closed her eyes as she held him closer.

"Brilliant! You did it!" A familiar voice exclaimed and Rose and the Doctor moved apart almost guiltily.

"Ace!" Rose identified her immediately and gave the other woman a hug, "You're back!"

"Yup, so's the Professor but he didn't want to disturb the two of you," Ace grinned at them both and winked, "Anyway, I thought you might like to know the way back?"

"Back?" Rose asked, glancing towards the Doctor nervously.

"Of course back! You don't want to stay in here forever can you? There are some scary things in here, let me tell you. Why I saw the Professor's collection of..."

"Ace!" the Seventh Doctor exclaimed as he stepped into the room, "I don't think you need to tell Rose that, right?"

"Oh, right then," Ace said, properly chastised, "Anyway, you need to get back to your own body. And the Doctor here needs to wake up. Jack's rather nervous right now, and we don't want to keep him waiting right?"

"Jack? Oh!" Rose's eyes widened.

"Exactly. So, if you'll take my hand I'll get you outta here. See ya later Professor!" Ace held out her hand.

"Rose," the Doctor said, "Wait."

Curious, she turned towards him only to unexpectedly feel his lips pressed against hers. Before she could react, his lips were gone and he smiled gently at her, "Thank you for believing."

"Anytime," Rose smiled as she grasped Ace's hand. As she felt herself move she could almost hear the Seventh Doctor exclaim, "Honestly, what am I doing these days?"

A second later, Rose Tyler opened her eyes.


	16. Chapter Sixteen: Epilogue

_Epilogue_

Her head felt fuzzy and she raised her hand to her forehead with a low groan. Her stomach growled irritably, and she felt as if she had not moved for days. She blinked her eyes and willed the fuzzy image leaning over her to clear.

"Rose? Can you hear me? Do you know where you are?"

For one horrible, horrible moment Rose thought she was back in the asylum. Then she saw Jack's face. With what could only be termed a happy squeal, Rose launched herself into Jack's startled arms and gave him a solid kiss. "Jack!"

His arms full of twenty first century shop girl, Jack could only grin, "If I had known that this was all I had to do to get you to kiss me, I should have done it sooner."

That was when Rose realized that Jack was completely naked. Blushing a bright red, she released him and moved away, "Um, Jack, you're naked."

"So I am," Jack agreed, "And you're alive." He couldn't stop grinning, and his grin only got wider as the Doctor moaned as well.

"Doctor!" Rose exclaimed as she finally saw him. She crawled across the bed to his side and grabbed his hand, "Doctor?"

The Doctor's eyes opened slowly, blinking at the harshness of the light. He muttered an ingenious, "Ow," before he focused his gaze on Rose. "You saved me," he whispered, "I remember."

"Of course I did," Rose said, feeling as if she were drowning in his eyes, "We saved each other." The two smiled happily at one another, content in the knowledge that they were together. Vaguely, she wondered if he would kiss her again.

Jack cleared his throat when it became apparent that neither one of his companions was going to move anytime soon. Ordinarily, he'd be jumping for joy at the apparent change in his rather sexually frustrated (his attempts to rectify those matters had been ignored, sadly) friends' relationship. However, there were other considerations to think about – specifically Adam-the-idiot. "Guys?"

Rose blinked as the moment was lost and fought the urge to yell at Jack for doing so. A moment later, all thoughts of kissing the Doctor (for real, this time) fled from her head.

"Adam!" The Doctor's incredulous shout caused the subject of his aggravation to stir and let out a low moan. "You mean Adam captured us; figured out how to cause me to wipe myself from Time; and almost succeeded?"

Jack nodded, "Yes, hard to believe isn't it?"

"It would...ow...have worked, too," Adam groaned from the floor, feeling as if he had been used as a punching bag. From the trio of glares aimed at him, he suspected that he had been. He slowly shifted himself into a standing position and wavered on his feet. He was unsurprised when no one reached out to steady him.

"Why?" Rose asked, sensing that she might be the only one who could possibly deal with this situation logically. Jack probably wanted to hit Adam and as for the Doctor – he was using that stare. She recognized that stare. It was the one he used to put the fear of death into his enemies. There was no telling what he might do.

"Because you dumped me, Rose! You stuck with him, and left me here on Earth with this hole in my head. You didn't even think about me, did you? Oh I saw you in history books, and remembered things from all the knowledge that I had downloaded from Platform Five, but there was no indication at all that you even cared. You left me!" Adam shouted.

"Can you blame me?" Rose asked, feeling all of the anger and fear that she had suffered during the 'three weeks' she was inside the asylum bubbling to the surface. "What have you done with your life, Adam? Nothing. You've put yourself on hold to get back at me and the Doctor. And you know what? Even if you had succeeded; even if you had wiped the Doctor from time; I would never stay with you. You, Adam, are an idiot. Me? I stick with the best, and I've got him..." she smiled at the Doctor before turning towards Jack and amending, "Them."

"You left me," Adam repeated in a small voice, as if he were pleading with her.

"She did," the Doctor said, standing beside Rose and entwining their hands together, "And we're going to do it again. Jack? Destroy that machine."

"With pleasure," Jack replied with a feral grin. He grabbed his blaster from where it was on the bed and proceeded to decimate the technology that had almost caused Time itself to rupture.

"Where's the TARDIS?" The Doctor asked, glaring at Adam.

"Outside. N…next to the shed," Adam stuttered. It suddenly dawned upon him just what he had almost done. Or, rather, had almost succeeded in doing. He felt rather small.

"I'll be keeping an eye on you, Adam. If you ever even think about doing something like this again – or kidnapping or otherwise harming Rose – there will be consequences."

Adam found the courage to laugh, "Consequences?"

"I've destroyed entire worlds," the Doctor growled, and Adam could see the truth of that statement in his eyes, "Do you honestly think that you, a tiny little ape, could stand a chance against me?"

Adam remained silent, but his eyes were wide.

"Doctor? Let's go home," Rose said, wanting nothing more to do with Adam Mitchell's tiny view of the world.

"Rose?" Adam asked, a pleading note in his voice.

Rose's eyes narrowed as she stalked up to Adam, "I have a gift for you, Adam. Something that I should have done a long time ago." Without telegraphing the move, Rose punched Adam's too-perfect chin. "If you ever, and I mean ever think of doing that again I'll kill ya. Got it?" She looked down at him with contempt in her eyes and quite deliberately turned her back on him.

"Rose!" Jack's exclamation was part astonished and part impressed.

"What? A little something that I learned from a friend," Rose shared a grin with the Doctor as she threaded her fingers through his, "Shall we?"

The trio left Adam fingering his chin in shock and headed outside. "Where to next, Rose Tyler?" The Doctor asked, his familiar manic grin setting her at ease.

"Oh, I don't know...surprise me."

"Don't mind if I do," the Doctor replied as he led his companions through the double doors to his TARDIS.

A moment later, nothing was left of the blue police box but a piece of paper twirling through the air and a memory.


End file.
